I play a number of sports as well as golf especially rugby.

I am extremely competitive by nature, so sport is just a wonderful outlet. So why oh why when it comes to golf can't I be as ruthless as I am when I play rugby ??!!

When I play in our club knockout comps I go 3up / 4up / 5up and then lose my concentration and wind up losing on the eighteenth !!

I have always enjoyed playing golf and try to be incredibly sporting when I play as I believe that is the basis of golf - is this why I can't find my killer instinct ?

Any advice would be gratefully received !!

You have the killer instinct within you and it shows in team sports..However the problem lies within yourself as an individual in individual sports.

What happens when you are 3 or 4 up, how do you feel. is it a case of inner self unrest whereby you feel it would be more comfortable for you to lose a couple of holes now rather than go on and kill it dead..

In a way you could be protecting your killer instinct behind your team mates in team sports but when it comes to individuality you need the comfort zone of not going for the kill but easing off..

The way forward Tricky may be to regroup within yourself when 3 or 4 up return your focus to the moment thus playing the hole shot by shot ignoring the response of your opponent until the last putt drops in. Then you can take off your hat and shake his hand..

It can be a cruel game so get out there and be cruel...

Stop counting your score or holes won, Fool yourself in to believing you are behind from the first to the last hole, and if that fails Spear tackle your opponent on the 17 th and drive his head in to the turf, err! perhaps not. :O)

Good advice from J and S. In my view it's about focussing on what you're about to do, rather than reflecting on what you've done. It's the old cliche 'one shot at a time.' Forget about the fact that you're up by two or three holes, concentrate on winning the next while keeping cool and calm about it. If you lose a hole, it's history, forget it.Relax and focus on keeping the ball in play on the next hole - chances are a par or even a bogey will suffice. In the end it's not a killer instinct, merely a professional attitude. But if the other guy turns it on and plays better, shake his hand, learn from it and head for the range! ED

Tricky - I have exactly the same issue. I've been helped this winter by playing each game as a way to try and have the best winning margin possible, I try and win every hole.
my problem in the past has been "I'm enjoying this game, I want to enjoy it for as long as possible" - new philosophy : "get it finished and enjoying thinking back to it from the bar".
I also too often start playing holes "carefully" to make sure I don't lose them ... better to play it hard and make the opponent win it.

Wow ! What good advice....

You guys have made some very valid points which are verging on psycho-analysis !!

What you say Parrott "I'm enjoying this game, I want to enjoy it for as long as possible" is very true. I find golf so relaxing and feel very content with life in general when I am playing. I guess it's the fresh air, no work and doing something I love.

When it comes to singles matches, even though I play off 14, I know that I am hard to play against as I am pretty consistent, competitive, and do shoot the odd exceptional round and I also never get thrashed by anyone on any handicap. I regularly go 3/4 up over my opponents but either just scramble a win or snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. It is mystifying !

Thanks you for your contributions so far it has made me think.